I have been asked a couple of times by many people why it is I fuss so much about my name. Hi, my name is Thoko. Simple, straight-forward two consonants, one vowel repeated, sounds pretty basic and simple, right? Well, apparently not. Many a time people attempt to Anglicise my non-Anglo name, from the very second they hear it. Why? I have a few theories as to why, and will attempt to dive into one today. Nonetheless, I have always been very adamant that my name is not an Anglo name, and as such have resisted any and all efforts of it being turned into such by simply not responding to any other name that is not my own. This of course has had me labelled by some, as a difficult person, black girl with an attitude, non team player, instigator, pot stirrer, etc, because can you imagine she got walked straight past me when I called her by a name that isn’t hers!
Now I struggle with the idea of someone thinking it is not only alright, but down right acceptable to just change someone else’s entire identity to suit themselves. A name is defined by the dictionary as the calling sound of a person, object or being; an identifier. There is a lot more to names than just calling sounds. When parents name their children world wide, it is often not just a spur of the moment thing that occurs; on the contrary a lot of thought, time and consultation goes into the naming of a child, and family conflict has often arisen over names given to children, ie who gets to name the child, which name is given, which grandchild gets to inherit the traditional first name to become, for example, William Junior.
A Taiwanese friend told me that in the Asian culture, a pregnant couple consults a spiritual leader, and a ceremony is held to try and identify the strong characteristics of the baby, and whatever the baby is presumed to be lacking is what is then used to determine the name of the baby. So, for example, if a baby is seen to be lacking in courage, it shall be given a name that means courage, therefore covering all potential weak spots in the baby’s life. In the African culture, we don’t have anything as fancy as the Asians, but traditionally, the first born child of the first born inherits the name of the grandfather. Where parents name a child, a lot of thought is put into a name depending on the circumstances under which a child is born.
Most parents give their children beautiful names. Zuva– translates to mean the sun, sunshine, day or daylight; and in a name means all of above; i.e. a source of warmth, light and life to the family has been born. Runyararo, translates to peace, tranquility, quiet and calm, and as a name is given to mean a source of peace and prosperity, of calmness and quiet in the family. Nyasha– translates to grace, and means God’s grace has fallen upon us as a family. Our names are not just random consonants and vowels put together, but have a much deeper meaning and history attached to them. A name attempts to show identity, i.e. you are French, or have French origins, you are Shona, Ndebele, Zulu, Ndau or a mixture of tribes.
So what irks me (and many other black folk) about people trying to Anglicise my name is that, it feels as though it is an attack on my roots, my culture, and my very being. People argue that our native names are difficult to pronounce, as if we native folks were born automatically able to pronounce the names Kimberley, Llyod or Shirkley. No, of course not! Names like any other parts of language, are learnt and given a few false starts, eventually everyone gets there. Thoko is literally tow and ko though, so not sure how Thoko is harder than Toks, or Teetee or… but I digress. Not even attempting to try say a name shows a supercilious attitude, a supremacy of sorts, that says, Your name is not worth my learning for your tribe or language, is not worth my efforts.
The thing is, my name reflects a history, a mixture of Shona and Ndebele blood that occurred 2 generations prior to me, and I love that when saying my full name any Zimbabwean is quick to pick that up. I am because of my ancestors who went before me, and each battle they fought and conquered made me who i am today. That is why in the corporate world, I refuse for people to think its ok for them to give me a name that tries to wash away, or tone down my blackness. A friend of mine recently said to me, you know, people think blackness is something you can switch on and off, a costume you can leave at home when going to work, and then put back on when you get back home. It isn’t! My grandmother was not as educated as I am, neither were my aunts, but the thing is, it is because of their sacrifices that I am who I am today. I sit on the shoulders of many great giants who went before me and sacrificed all they could and had at the time so that the future generations, i.e me, could be who and where I am today, and I refuse for their hard work to be washed away.
All the great leaders who fought for their people, never fought for their people to become like others, but fought for their people to experience freedom to become full version of themselves. Herbert Chitepo was not fighting for us to become white, on the contrary his fight was for us to be allowed to be full versions of ourselves, black and proud, black and unapologetic! Same goes for Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela, Mbuya Nehanda, etc.
Sigh…A name is never something people should try to change to suit themselves, and this goes for any culture! To think one can simply change your identity to suit his/her own needs shows a level of grave disrespect that transcends generations.
So folks, next time you meet someone, and they tell you My name is Babalwa, the response should be: Lovely to meet you Babalwa; and never! Oh lovely to meet you Babs, I can call you Babs right? No! No madam, you certainly may not!
God bless
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